@ AVB

## ParentCoin; limitless

There's this almost altcoin-like pitch of parenthood these days. I might’ve fallen for the shiny marketing of parenthood — cute baby pics, promises of legacy, the whole “you’ll change the world” vibe. I even heard a would-be mom tell me once (true story) "You know having children, you don't have to be afraid of it, as a dad it doesn't cost as much as you think". \ These people actually believe that. Just like they've fallen for every fiat-scam out there: housing, cars, holidays in France, Nike shoes, 50% taxation, religion and main stream media subscriptions.\ \ It’s 2025, and I’m revisiting this like I’d revisit an old Lightning Network post. \ \ Having kids is like chasing an altcoin airdrop with a slick but buzzword laden whitepaper and a charismatic founder who’s probably exit-scamming as soon as he gets enough of your money in their bank account (yeah you see what I did there). If you're lucky that founder might twerk from time to time to get your attention. But don't hope for too much. Now change that diaper and work an extra job to pay for all of it while inflation murders you.\ \ While you do all that, the most damaging thing about the Having Children Shitcoin (HCS) is the time it takes. It literally can't be shorted like some token on an exchange. It laughs, plays around with your tech gadgets, has to be potty trained (like some altcoin founders) and needs attention, education and a lot of proof of work.\ But the damage is the time. \ The time it takes to do all that, is actually replacing value with time. \ Bitcoin might be a product of proof of work, HCS is not a product but the actual proof of work without the value proposition.\ On top of that, the founder usually lives rent-free in your head your whole life, or even worse: you literally live together with her/him.\ Imagine Satoshi Nakamoto living at your house right now. Like... hi Satoshi.. love your bitcoin man.\ "Yeah, thanks moth**f****r, when are going to buy more skittle and some toilet paper? We ran out 10 minutes ago when I shit all over your dirty toilet, ..."\ "Eh, But Satoshi, why don't you go to the shop to..."\ "Shut up you f'ing a--hole, you made me! You made me what I am today! You liked me when I invented thàh bitcoin right? Now get me some toilet paper and here's a list of items I want from the supermarket! Lazy dumb idiot."\ "You'll clean up the kitchen right?"\ "Yeah yeah, rolls eyes, after my Netflix series man... now get out"\ \ This might sound far-fetched but founders of shitcoins steal your money, while children steal your time ànd money while you have to endure the founders as well.

Time is slowly damaging you while you live your life further and further away from the hard-money proposition. Hell, you even will need to sell some hard money to get by. Because it's a rotten world and children make you short sighted about the future (it limits you to maximum 3 years ahead in my experience with people around me).

Long-term is your enemy Short-term is your prison

You’re hyped for the long-term gains—multi-generational dynasties, just like the elites—but the fine print? It’s a mess. I’m here to unpack the hope, the scepticism, and the grim reality of raising kids in a world that feels like it’s speedrunning towards the absolute bottom. Let me make that clearer:

Our power (as bitcoiners) doesn't grow with these new generations, because we're being out-Idiocracy'd at a rate we can’t reproduce our way out of. Bitcoiners don’t scale. Even if you produce two children that both become die-hard bitcoin maximalists (with a nasal voice and a fondness for TD-sequential analysis.

The Mirage of Birth Having a kid is like snagging a hyped-up crypto airdrop. You’re told it’s “free” value — new life, pure joy, a legacy token dropped into your wallet. Everyone’s tweeting about it, posting ultrasound pics like they just scored 10,000 USDC worth of free shitcoin tokens.

But then the transaction fees hit, getting another place to live more accommodating, getting a school, adopt a dad body demeaner while torpedoing your social life and having no fun other than baking cakes and getting less pussy than a laser pointer with dead batteries. Adjust for inflation), sleepless nights, a vortex of money being vaporized and a lifetime of HODLing a position you can’t dump nor short. You’re basically the holder of last resort for a diatribe of chaos. You’re the entry, the trade, and exit liquidity. The real kicker? Society’s cheering you on while you’re stuck debugging your life and seeing your time drained. You’re frozen in time, while you should be scaling ideas. \ \ Or getting more out of life than being the channelling of funds to a future fiat oppressed kid. Meanwhile, parents (if they stay together that is... with relations with kids having their own version of the bitcoin “halving”, be it every 7 years or so. The parents follow the higher noble goal and get some love and nice moments in return. \ \ They’re stacking diapers instead of sats, living above a dry cleaner next to a subway station that rattles your soul. You can’t short kids, no matter how much you see the “childfree” crowd thriving. The childfree crowd is also not always that neutral, as many of them want this same life, because the marketing, as with many shitcoins is excellent. It makes life more fun, more fulfilling, more whole, while promising you cheap, fast and always immutable transactions. You’re getting duped. \ You buy more stuff, more hobbies no one cares about, and smile at other parents at these gatherings like you’re at the whale room at a bitcoin conference in a bear market. Keep smiling, bitches. That’s you’re life now. The numbers don’t lie. Society sells parenthood as a Bitcoin-level HODL, but the safety net is thinner than a layer-2 solution created by an Albanian exchange.

Raising kids is like betting your airdropped tokens will moon into a blue-chip asset that takes care of you when you’re old. You’re hoping they’ll HODL your hand, not rug-pull you into a nursing home when their “value” spikes. It’s a gamble: will they be decent humans or turn into TikTok zombies? Back in the day, kids were economic assets, working the farm or whatever. Now? You’re praying they don’t ghost you after college or at least recognize all the proof of work you did for them. And yes, you can have a big impact on them, that’s something to be proud of if it works out. But in the end, you are you, a person, with dreams, hopes and needs. \ And your children are too,... they’ll always win. \ \ Teaching them to ride a bike is fun, but it’s like a shitcoin pumping on a founder’s tweet: fleeting, followed by a crash whenever you see the effects of your years of de-progress and social isolation. Socializing with other parents is like making friends with a fellow prisoner of war in some jungle camp, ... you’ll have to be nice because it’s all you have left of society’s pleasantries. So you make small talk or a little joke about a toy someone’s kid has brought to the playground. The real world would see these people piss all over your grave if they could. They’re the figurehead on a ship of fools. And you play along because you’re a total bitch that got stuck in the routine of the famous HCS. Finding trust is hard, certainly in a city’s virtual prison camp where you play Russian roulette for other people’s amusement. It’s like running a Lightning node — fun in theory, but you’re babysitting a system that crashes when you need it most. The highs are real, but “kinda fun” doesn’t cut it when you’re debugging life. \ \ The 35k to 200k € it will cost you throughout your life, is not measurable as gains or losses. Look at the lovely baby pictures, look at their school results, the painting they made especially for you saying “I love you, for the best dad/mom in the whole world”. It hits straight to your brain’s nucleus accumbens. It’s all the balanced injection of the right shot of chemical balanced reward center (ventral tegmental area) food. \ And people with kids wanted that because that’s what the system and urges are. Kids are a leveraged position with no stop-loss, unlike an airdrop you can dump when the hype fades. You’re all-in, praying society doesn’t crash before your “asset” matures. In the meanwhile, you get the occasional surprise through your mesolimbic pathway. \ \ "Happy you" proof of stakes' the unhappy you later. You could be in the Maldives diving into clear water while talking to another “founder”. Funny how that works. \ Meanwhile, the childfree are staking their tokens and chilling. \ Parents aren’t building dynasties; we’re just trying not to get rug-pulled by daycare costs and rotten school-systems that learn our kids to be obedient consumers and non-thinking parrots. It’s a financial social anti-grind with no cure, and the charts, unlike fiat-corporate nonsense, don’t lie.

The elites stack power like blue-chip stocks, minting wealth across centuries. Us? Our kids might be fighting over the leftovers while they battle their way through university diversity and mediocracy. Future generations are supposed to carry the torch, but consumerism and cultural decay make it feel like we’re being out-Idiocracy’d. \ We need to think long-term, teach kids to code, stack sats, and question the system. But above all else, we need them to learn that being more evil is more just. Being complacent in this farce of a system means always, and I mean always, that the multi-generational monsters will prevail. \ \ They’re more stubborn, faster, better educated and they take the shortcuts you can’t have. We have hard money, they have “hard world”.

Conclusion

Eighteen years into this parenting thing (or eight minutes—who’s counting?), it’s clear: kids are a shitcoin airdrop with no exit strategy for you. \ The highs are sweet, the costs are brutal, and the long-term. A gamble on humanity in a world trending toward a broad brush of average things made normal.

Maybe it’s not about winning the bitcoin standard, but betting on something bigger than yourself within yourself, even if that market’s rigged with traps and detractors everywhere. Stack sats, stack diapers, and pray your kids don’t rug-pull your heart. \ Because, let’s face it, we’re not the Rothschilds — we’re just HODLing and hoping. \ While we should be fighting with the hardest money. \ While your baby cries for more food, I hear Michael Jackson sing “If you can’t feed your baby hi hee-hee, then don’t have a baybaah”. \ \ The sad part is, that we're all torn between chasing the fiat-created dreams and the reality that everything is in fact a shitcoin sapping either your time, money or effort. \ Even within the bitcoin space, we don't realize what the next step should be.\ It certainly isn't big families. That's for sure.

AVB\ tipjar: https://allesvoorbitcoin.be/donate/