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@ Rick ~ ThrivingNow
2025-06-09 12:45:21Finding Calm in the Chaos
Ever notice how you start future-mapping to calm your nerves… and end up more anxious than when you began? You’re not alone! Join us for a playful, real-talk exploration of why our brilliant minds try to control everything — and how empathy, Buddhist wisdom, and EFT tapping can help us step out of the anxious loop and land back in the delicious now.
https://www.thrivingnow.center/t/1491/4
We covered…
1. Future Mapping is Fish-and-Water Awareness We often don’t realize how much mental energy we spend constantly planning scenarios - “if it rains, if they get upset, if this happens then that…” This protective pattern started early but now we can bring it into conscious awareness and choose how much energy to invest.
2. The Empathy App Creates Endless Scenarios Our empathetic nature means we’re not just planning for ourselves - we’re mapping out everyone else’s potential reactions, feelings, and needs. This creates exponentially more “what if” scenarios that keep our minds spinning in overdrive.
3. Fault-Finding is Too Crude for Thriving When we automatically assign blame (usually to ourselves), we’re operating from primitive brain patterns. Upgrading to a more refined viewpoint means seeing the “dance of energies” where everyone contributes and sometimes feet get stepped on - it’s part of life.
4. We Can’t Actually Control the River Life flows like a river, and we can steer our canoe but we cannot change the river itself. Our anxiety often signals we’re trying to do the impossible - control weather, other people’s moods, or outcomes beyond our influence.
5. Magical Thinking Says “If I Worry Enough, It Will Work Out” We unconsciously believe that suffering through worry ahead of time will somehow guarantee good outcomes. Our nervous system knows this is a lie, which creates more anxiety. We can release this “prepayment” fantasy.
6. Distributing the Broccoli Back to Its Owners We often scoop up everyone else’s responsibilities onto our plate to avoid conflict or being blamed. Learning to ask “Is this really my broccoli?” helps us return emotional and practical responsibilities to their rightful owners.
7. Include Safe and Good Possibilities in Your Maps When we only map threats and problems, we miss opportunities for joy, connection, and creative solutions. Consciously including positive possibilities activates different parts of ourselves - the creative, hopeful, and inspired aspects.
8. Tapping While Thinking Moves Energy Out of Stuck Loops Simply speaking our thoughts aloud while tapping the acupressure points breaks the narrow band of mental spinning. This engages our body’s intelligence and often reveals what words or feelings want to emerge beyond our conscious planning.
9. Being With What Is vs. Making Everyone Happy Instead of trying to make everyone feel good all the time (which is impossible), we can practice being present with people as they actually are. This is more respectful, connected, and requires much less exhausting management.
10. Anxiety Can Be Wise Body Guidance Rather than just a problem to fix, our anxiety often signals we’re trying to do something unwise - like changing unchangeable things or telling ourselves lies about what we can control. We can listen to this guidance.
11. The Sweet Spot of Thoughtful Planning We’re not throwing away our planning abilities - we’re finding the balance between appropriate preparation (throwing an umbrella in the bag) and exhausting over-management (trying to control every possible variable). Good and sufficient planning honors both our intelligence and life’s natural flow.